It’s easy to talk with friends and share my adventures and struggles, but when it comes to putting this into print for others to read, I have been met with some challenges, mostly from my mind. After having Lyme, it has affected my ability to read and to see letters. It has affected my ability to spell simple words. It has affected my ability to speak and think clearly, and to write in any sort of order. But, although I may be working slower than I used to, I have help and support and I am continuing onward……….
Here are some of the other questions that I have been popping up in my thoughts:
How do I take you along with me, as if you were actually there on the adventure with me? Can I actually describe this well enough for you to understand?
What if you don’t find humor in the same things as I do?
What if my words or story don’t make sense?
What if you don’t like what I am sharing?
What if no one wants to read this?
What if I am judged by the stories I choose to include?
There have been lots of emotions that bubble up, as with anything I put out to the public. With the thoughts that come up as I am writing, I try to notice them, to acknowledge them and just keep moving through it. My desire is to write and to share. My experience so far with sharing through workshops and presentations has been positive, with people asking for more. So I remind myself of the truth that I see being reflected back to me. It feels vulnerable to be sharing some of the deepest parts of my life and my spiritual journey.
One thing that I want to be absolutely clear about is that my life isn’t only about Lyme Disease, and neither is my book. I have lived an amazing, incredible, adventurous life, before, during, and after the illness and I continue to climb the summits of my dreams!
This is a short excerpt, a quick glimpse into one of the scenes from my book, “It’s in Your Dreams.” I sure do love backpacking and sleeping on the earth! Enjoy ~
“…Watching the stars cross the night sky and awakening to the rising sun warming the earth, I observe how each of the night and day transitions is unique and ever changing. Each night I go to sleep in a new place, and each morning I am greeted by the Earth in a new way. I noticed that the soft breeze gently bounced the tiny alpine plants which grabbed my attention and brought my swirling thoughts into the full present moment of the day. I tried to absorb all of the tiny details that this moment offered. I could hear the other two instructors laughing in the early morning over the subtle sounds of the metal spatula on the old fry bake. The smell of the coffee and the water boiling over a Whisperlite stove comforted me as I began to stir and wake for the day. The fresh, crisp mountain air filled my lungs and the moist, earthy smell of the trees and dirt filled me with hope, wonder, and awe. My head was covered by my warm mummy sleeping bag. When I peeked out and looked around, my eyes were met with a deep golden sunlight, my cheeks cooled by the morning high alpine air, and my stomach full of butterflies with the joy of actualizing my deepest dream!
I slid out of my bag, exposing my body and long underwear to the cool morning mountain air. I stretched, yawned, and looked around. In the distance I could hear the other instructor, Mark, belting out his favorite morning tune, “One more cup of coffee before I go…”
I knew I had the best job in the whole entire world. I stumbled my way over the sharp rocks in bare feet toward our “kitchen,” my old worn black sneakers tucked under my arm. We were on day 21 on a 30-day backcountry expedition, and my first course to work for the National Outdoor Leadership School, NOLS.…”
I just want to thank everyone who has been supporting me on this journey! All of your phone calls, messages, and supporting my Kickstarter Campaign to help to get this book published is gratefully appreciated. Thank you so much!
I’d love to hear your comments or questions below ~